“The crow commands, the captive must obey.” – George R. R. Martin
For the sake of transparency, I must solemnly admit that I have no idea what the above quote means, but my heart has become intent recently on the idea of searching for quotes on google and my captive brain has no choice but to obey.
During my recent early morning runs, or my angry achilles tendon may insist on calling them jogs, I am slightly embarrassed and uneasy to say that I have been chased by birds. I wish I could say this is a euphemism, but, alas, it is not, and my newfound avian nemesis is none other than the not-so-humble crow.
Until now, I’ve usually considered my 5:30am runs a sanctuary of peace and solitude, a place where my mind can wander, perhaps even drifting so far as to sing a few lines from the 1980 hit from The Vapors “I think I’m turning Japanese.” These idyllic and peaceful runs are no longer what they once were. Two consecutive days of being swooped by crows has increased my stress level to almost that of a sake-swilling, karaoke-singing Japanese salaryman.
My first attempt at repelling these long-beaked monsters involved me flailing my arms above my head, akin to something out of an 80s aerobics vhs tape. Such a vagary proved almost too much for the throng of early morning commuters scurrying to the local train station.
My second attempt involved a decidedly loud high-pitched squeal. The results on the surrounding human population were less than favorable. The same can be said about the crow population.
Time to rethink my approach for next time. Then hopefully I’ll have something to crow about!
Japan Boy Running 